Maria.

Maria died today.
I know in my head that “death has no sting,” but today it sure does sting. It is so surreal, we are their teachers so we teach the kids to read and do math. But we are here with so much more in mind. The school is called Community Hope School. We are here to change the whole community through training these kids in the ways of God. We have poured ourselves into this little girl, and just like that she is gone.

Maria won the academic award last year. She was one of the smartest girls in our class. Maria liked to talk, sit sideways in her chair and chat with the girl who sits next to her.
Maria loved to answer questions, she excelled in spelling class, and was also a whiz in science.

Her desk sits empty now. The kids cried today, they made cards for her yesterday writing things like “I love you, I miss you, please come back soon.” Please pray for us and the kids as we grieve the loss of this little one. Pray for her mother too.

They still suspect meningitis, but will know for sure after they do an autopsy. They have ruled out the extremely contagious strain of meningitis so we should all be fine. Maria had a vaccination a few months ago. I just cannot wrap my brain around this. No class at school or church prepared us for this.
Of all the kids in the class I was sure that Maria would go to college one day.

Tonight we turn to God for comfort. The kids are busy memorizing Psalm 23, and they are able to cling to it now. If you have any suggestions on helping kids deal with loss, we are open to hearing it!

Thank you for all the prayer!

Urgent Prayer Request!

Please continue to pray for Maria. Maria is in grade 2, on Sunday she had a headache and a fever, on Monday she was committed to the hospital to the ICU. They did a CT scan today and found that her brain is swollen and is surrounded by fluid. They suspect meningitis but it is impossible to do a LP in her condition. They already think she will have brain damage if she survives this.
We know that God can heal her, please pray without stopping. Add her to your church prayer chain. Get your friends and family to pray for her.

Pray for her family too, her mom is beside herself and is by her side in the I.C.U.

This really looks bad, pray pray pray!!!

Ever see that movie District 9?

 

 It seems the aliens have invaded my kitchen. And guess what? This little guy can FLY! Whopeee!

So much to be thankful for!

This past weekend three of our students slept over at our house. It was a lot of fun. We introduced them to UNO, they picked it up really quickly and they loved to play! They were quite intrigued by David’s new old school lawn mower, (you know one of those push mowers with the blades) and they took turns using it. It was funny, and we got some of our weeds cut down 🙂

We enjoyed dinner around the table, like a family. It was nice to sit and hear about them each personally. It is so easy to get caught up with 108 kids at school and miss out on each kid’s individual story. One of the girls that came is quiet at school, she takes a really long time to warm up to anyone. We think this weekend was a great step for her, and we had the opportunity to build her trust in us.
We watched The Princess and the Frog, and then it was time to go to sleep. It was fun to lay in bed and listen to them giggle and whisper. I remember those days!

On Sunday we all went off to church. The sermon was fantastic. It was about what is means to be the church. It was so uplifting and challenging at the same time. The preacher challenged us to “first seek the Kingdom of God.” I think we easily let other things get in the way, I think I really needed to hear it! They also baptized two people, it always makes me cry when I witness someone becoming a Christian, it is such a celebration! After church we had a discussion with the girls about the difference between confirmation and baptism. They had some great questions and listened eagerly!

After that we were off to the park to play soccer and frisbee, these kids can run! As I have mentioned before I have been working out each day, so I was able to keep up with them, but we were exhausted when the day was over!

# 36 I am thankful for the overwhelming response to my last post on here. I was comforted by the comments and kind words, the emails and the verses given to me. This week I learned that somehow we are never alone. I have felt so much love this past week, I wish I could give you all a bug hug, and I am not a hugger!
A friend responded with a verse:
“I would have lost heart,unless I had believed.That I would see the goodness in the Lord, in the land of the living. Wait on the Lord;be of good courage;and He will strengthen your heart. Wait, I say, on the Lord.” Psalm 27:13-14
I feel like a cloud has been lifted and I have had a smile on my face all weekend. Thank you all!

#37 We have a visitor from the US coming in a few weeks. Mark is the leader of our mission team back in Colorado, and he is a missionary himself. He is coming out just to check up on us, and to evaluate how our year has been. And, he has graciously said we can use his second piece of luggage, so we have been buying things on-line to ship to David’s parent’s house we also gave them a ridiculous shopping list. So in a few weeks we will have fudge-rounds, oatmeal cream pies, board games, and even bigger smiles on our faces. So I am thankful for all this fun stuff, but mostly for someone who cares so much about us, and about what we are doing here that he is flying out to check up on us. Let me tell you people, the journey is not am easy one! Thanks Mark!

#38 I also was to specially thank David’s parents for doing all that shopping, and for packing and repacking to make sure that everything fits. It really will be like Christmas morning!

#39 My mom is making a great recovery. Thanks to all who sent messages, and who prayed and who asked about her. You warmed my heart.

#40 Our health. We have had a rough couple of weeks. David is still getting over whooping cough. But, we live in a place that has some of the highest infection rates for HIV and TB. We are blessed to be healthy enough to do what we are doing, and to not fear that our lives will be prematurely ended by diseases. So today, I am thankful for our health.

#41 Three special little girls that brought light into our weekend. I loved having the kids around. When we got up on Sunday morning to three kids in our home, it just felt right. I think we may be having more sleepovers in the future 🙂

#42 Sugar-free Ice cream.

#43 All Nations Church. On Sunday as we were leaving, one of the leaders asked David to be part of a team of guys who will be designing and building a 25ft climbing wall for their youth ministry. This is right up David’s alley. Also they sang a song about joy coming in the morning. It was a good day.

#44 The cello player in church. Our church has a cello in the band. It is so beautiful.

#45 Composition class. So as most of you know, our grade five teacher had to leave the country. He is now in South Africa awaiting word on his visa. In the meantime I am taking over teaching the grade five composition class. Can I just say I loved creative writing when I was in school. I feel like I am about to burst with ideas. Please pray that the kids will catch some of this excitement!

Today it has been two years.

I have been going back and forth on posting about this. David and I are very private people, and writing about our struggles to have a child has been difficult for both of us, but also good as more people are praying. We also have received beautiful encouraging e-mails from many of you! Thank you all for that.
Today is the two year anniversary of when we decided it was time to start trying for a family. We sat in a little restaurant in Moberly, we were both so excited. When we were juniors in college we considered letting me drop out so that we could begin a family, but had decided against that as we had less than two years left. That day we were a couple of months away from graduating, we had a long discussion on whether I would be able to keep up my G.P.A while dealing with morning sickness. We were so naive!
We both cried, sitting in that restaurant. Our hearts soared as we walked out of the restaurant, we talked for weeks about baby names and how we would have to spend our furlough so that our families could see our beautiful child. It was a dreamy and blissful time.
Now as I sit here it is difficult to explain what it feels like to have such a deep and personal aching. The pain is not only there when we think about the baby we have never held. But also when we see parents with their teenagers, proud moments at graduations, and people who have more kids than they know what to do with.
In the past two years we have endured endless questions on why we do not have kids yes. It feels so strange that it is an acceptable thing to ask in our society today, but it is! Everyone has had an opinion on when we should have kids! We decided to let a few people in on our struggles, hoping that it would stop the awkward and heart wrenching questions. BUT telling people that you are having trouble opens an entire different floodgate of painful questions and unhelpful advice.
I thought I could take today to write about some of the ways that you may be able to reach out and help someone in your life who may be struggling with infertility. I have taken these suggestions from resolve.org a national infertility support site. So here goes:

1. Telling them to relax.
This may seem harmless enough, but it is a kick in the stomach to anyone with infertility. IF is a diagnosed medical problem. It would be like telling someone who has cancer to relax and then they will get better. It also puts stress on the couple, especially the woman, making her feel that she is doing something wrong. I cannot tell you how many people have told me to relax, and it is absolutely true that it makes you feel like it is your fault. Also there are many people who get pregnant in extremely stressful situations (such as rape), so there you have it boys and girls, relaxing will not get you pregnant! 🙂

2. Don’t tell them to adopt to get pregnant.
This one baffles me the most. I have been told countless times in the last two years to adopt a child and then I would get pregnant. I have even been told, and I quote, “when you adopt, and you hold that baby for the first time the feeling of holding a child will make the hormones in your body pump out correctly and you will get pregnant right away.”
I had to smile and nod, even though it was terribly awkward to hear this guy talk about my hormones, and painful to hear.
And here is what I find wrong with being told that. Would the adopted child then be sent back once it magically made us conceive our own child? I cannot understand the motivation behind this one, but you would be surprised at how many times I have been told this.
Also everyone might think they know someone who this happened to. (Like the mailman’s cousin’s best friend’s visiting exchange student’s great aunt twelve times removed.) However the true statistic is that only five percent of couple who adopt then have natural pregnancies.

3. Don’t push adoption.
Infertility is like losing a loved one. Every month there is hope and joy and expectation, and then also pain and disappointment and crushing feeling of loss. Before a couple is ready to move to adoption they have to grieve the loss of their own child. I always dreamed that our baby would have my nose and David’s green eyes. I have to let that go first. Does that make sense?
Furthermore, adoption is very very expensive and it is very long process.

4. Don’t gossip about you friend’s condition.
I have had people who knew nothing about what was going on with us come up and ask specifics about what so and so doctor had said. Things I had only shared with a couple of people. It is absolutely terrifying to think that people are out there discussing such our reproductive lives!!! I know this may seem like a strange thing for me to write about on my PUBLIC blog, but there are many thing that are kept private. Respect your friend’s privacy.

5. Don’t make crude remarks.
I think the title here says it all. The personal details are personal, don’t make jokes about them.

6. Don’t complain about your pregnancy.
I am not sure what else to write here. Just remember that there are some who would give anything to have your morning sickness if it meant they had a baby to take home in the end. Also, there are many other people who are not infertile that you can complain to. Be sensitive to your friend, if they make an excuse to not be at your baby shower don’t push it (and don’t expect them to throw you a shower either 🙂 ).

7. I also have heard many things about infertility and ministry. Or shall I say fertility and ministry. We were once told that a couple without children are not as effective as a couple with children when doing ministry in Africa.I cried for weeks after I was told that. The person who said it had no idea what we were going through. It was a sucker punch!
We are thriving here now tough, and we are able to reach out to other who have the same struggles. I am thinking about finding out whether the missionary convention can do a workshop on fertility in ministry, and if not then maybe leading one.
I think it is something that needs to be addressed in the church. More couples out there have this than we realize and most of the support I have found has come from outside the church and from non-Christians.

8. Remember them on mother’s day.
Enough said.

9.Don’t say they are not meant to be parents.
Infertility is a medical condition, not a punishment from God. I have been told that I must have some hidden sin in my life and thus the IF.

If you have made it this far you deserve a cookie. I cannot give you one over the internet, so I shall wait while you go to your kitchen and get yourself one…………………………………………………………………..

I would not trade our day in the restaurant two years ago for anything. Those first few months of daydreaming and bliss are something that we cherish and hold on to. I told someone this past week that I am not sure that having our own child would ever heal the hurt that we have felt in the last two years completely. I think that whatever the outcome we have been though fire and we will come out stronger on the other side.
This verse has become a daily motto for me: Psalm 30:5 “Though the weeping will last through the night, joy comes in the morning.” We do wish we knew what time of night it was, but we hold on to the promises God has given us in scripture. And we begin our days with anticipation for what God has in store for us. We have learned that one cannot always know what God is doing in a situation until it has passed and you can look back.
God is good!

HHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

So we had a kind of rough day and decided that we would go out to dinner, to Marua mall. We parked where we did last time, you know, that time the car died and it rained really hard?! So we double checked to make sure all the lights were turned off, and they were.
We enjoyed a good dinner, with commentary from an “Olive Oil for hair” campaign that was going on across the mall.

After the dinner it started raining softly as we walked to the car and got it.
David turned the key, and all we heard was a faint clicking sound. And then the lightning flashed and the rain started to pour out in buckets again!!
David worked on the battery for a little while, it seems we have a bad connection, but to no avail. We asked some people who were parked close to us for a jump, they came over and gave us the jump,  but alas once again the car was deader than a door knob.

They left, after the obligatory sheepish looks, and the rain started to come down harder.

At this point David’s teeth started chattering from the cold, so he did what anyone would do, he started knocking on different things in the engine with a metal tool, from his toolbox (this is key later in the story), and it worked…a little bit.

We were then able to turn on the dash lights! It was like a sad, cold, and wet Christmas 🙂
David decided that perhaps a jump start would work now, so he walked in the rain to the front of the mall door to ambush people as they walked out. EVERY SINGLE person said no! It was absolutely ridiculous. David even told them they would not even have to get out of their cars, he would do it all. It was a sad day for Namibian reputations. Some people even refused to make eye contact with him.
So we did what we had to. We called Adam. Again. (At this point our heads are hanging in shame).
He agreed to come out immediately (like he always does, so helpful!).

THEN someone actually agreed to help us! It was a man on a roadtrip, he actually had a reason to say no! He also had his lady friend with him, in hindsight I think perhaps he said yes so that he could impress her.
AND it worked! The car jumped to life (we are considering renaming it Lazarus), and we could finally get home.
We drove out of the parking lot (after calling Adam and sharing our fantastic news) high on life! It was a great feeling!
But alas, as we turned the corner we heard a strange sound, it sounded like an open toolbox that had been used to try and revive a dead battery and then had been placed on the roof of the car in a hurry hitting the wet road, a very strange sound to hear. But then David stopped and we looked back on the dark shiny road, and there in the dark lay our toolbox, splayed open with rivets and wrenches and screwdrivers and screws littering the street.
So we did what anyone would do, we abandoned our car and ran to the tools like crazy people.
There we were crawling around on the street, in the dark, in the pouring rain, looking for lost nails and abandoned hammers.
It was quite hilarious.
Then a man drives up and is so nice that he shines his headlights on the street for us, and then leans out of his window to point at lost tools while honking his horn to alert us to the whereabouts of our tools. Really helpful, especially the honking was helpful.

So I don’t know if I have told you guys about our South African anti-hijacking alarm system. But we have one that will start to bleep for 90 seconds to warn the hijaker and then it will cut the power to the car if the car is ever hijaked.

So as we are crawling around with Helpful Henry honking his horn at us the alarm starts to bleep. Now we know if we don’t get to the car in time the engine will cut out and we will be back to square one, except this time square one will be in a dark alley rather than a lighted parking lot.
So David looks at me with panic written all over his face. He yells grab these and throws the tools in my direction, then he kicks off his shoes is wreck-less abandon and takes off down the street towards our car. 
Picture this, you come up to a couple crawling in the road, you figure out that they are looking for shiny pieces of metal so you give them a hand, all of a sudden the guy jumps up thrusts mangled tools in the woman’s hands and runs away like a crazy person.
I do wish I had the ability to read minds, so that I could know what Helpful Henry thought at that point. Perhaps he thought that David was a thief and was trying to get away, or that he had the sudden urge to go to the bathroom! I of course am cracking up at this point, so yes, we look like two complete nutters.
I am sure we will now meet Helpful Henry in the next week. He will either be a government official or the pastor of a church, and he will recommend counseling to us 🙂

David’s mad dash did pay off though, he got to the car in a nick of time! We drove home, and now we are trying to get warmed up again.
HAPPY ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY TO US!

Thankfully our home was not flooded when we got home. Here is a picture of David, he is soaked through.

MARCH 23!

How did this happen?? It is the 23rd day of March. Do you know what that means? It means that it is exactly one whole year since we boarded a plane in Denver Colorado and bid farewell to America.

WE HAVE BEEN HERE FOR A WHOLE YEAR  NOW!

Wow!

They year has flown by. Just this morning we were discussing the fact that Namibia really feels like home to us. We never really went through any culture shock. It feels like this has been our home for a longer time than just one year. We do of course miss our family and friends dearly, but I think we are exactly where we are supposed to be.

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

Happy 21st Birthday Namibia!!!

Today Namibia is celebrating it’s twenty first independence day. Namibia has made great strides since gaining independence. It is politically stable, the economy is growing, there is no war or rumor of war in the country, most of the citizens are relatively happy, and it is an example to other African nations in race relations. We are absolutely blessed to be living in Namibia, and it is evident that God has big plans for the people of this nation. Please take a moment to day and pray for Namibia, for the next 21 years, and for the people of Namibia!

So today I am thankful for:

#27: Namibia, the beautiful country that we call home.

#28: Health. Since the fourteenth of February I have been trying to do at least one cardio activity each day, and I have been watching what I eat. Recently (and by dr’s orders) I have switched to a low GI diet. I have dropped 13 pounds and at least one dress size! I can feel my body getting healthier, my lung capacity is improving, and I hardly ever have asthma attacks now. I can really see a difference in my overall health!! Just post a question if you are interested in what I am eating or in what a low GI diet is.

#29: One of one time with the kids. In the last few weeks some of the older kids at school have taken to coming into David’s office to just hang out. It has been so nice to get to know the kids more in an out of class setting. I think we have lost that as we now are so busy teaching and working on getting the school to run smoothly. We will have some of the girls over for a sleep over this next weekend. Pray for them!!

#30: Sugar-free chocolate mousse. I have found the most delicious sugar free chocolate mousse packets here. Being low GI is not that bad thanks to these little envelopes of deliciousness.

#31: Today I am thankful for David Echols. We have had a rough couple of weeks. We spent an evening with some friends and their two babies. At one point the women left to go and breast feed. In that moment I felt more defective, and heartbroken than I ever have. They then came back into the room and talked for a long time about how great it is to have children, and the new things that their kids were learning, and how their lives are now different. It was a long painful night, but David was there to squeeze my hand and hold me when we got home. IF is a long, lonely and painful journey, but I have the most supportive and amazing man next to me, holding me up when I am ready to fold.

#32: Butterflies! This is a little weird, but in Science class I showed a you tube clip of the metamorphosis of a butterfly. It was amazing and hilarious to watch the kid’s faces and reactions. They were absolutely shocked! I heard whispers of “I don’t believe it! I can’t believe it!” It was a great reminded of the awe that there is in creation. To see the innocence on their faces as they discovered what God had placed on the earth for them was magical.
I think sometimes we all need to take a step back and remember the goodness of God, and we should do it with the attitude of a seven year old discovering a butterfly for the first time!

#33: The students in grade 6 and 7 who have showed interest in becoming Christians. I feel like we have a long journey with them. It is difficult, some of them have already changed their minds. We are trying to make sure the kids who are ready, and ready for the right reasons, and not just because their friends are, or because they think we may give them something. One of the kids actually said “They are going to get sweets and ice cream now because they want to be Christians” We are not sure where the kids come up with some of their ideas.

#34: My mom. Last week I got a text from my dad at 9:30 pm. It read  ” I am at the ER, your mom totaled her car.” I called immediately and he was unable to tell me much, just that they were checking her for a broken neck and pelvis. I was a wreck after that. I was freaking out, and every time I tried to call after that the connection was so bad I only caught parts of words. It was terrifying. I was getting ready to book a flight down there when my mom called me. She said she was being released and that no bones had been broken, but that she was bruised from head to toe, and she would need extensive physical therapy. I ugly cried after wards, when I thought about what could have happened. She was hit by a drunk driver in the passenger side. My mom said if you see the car you would be amazed that anyone walked away from the wreck.
Thank you so much to everyone who prayed with me and to all who sent messages of encouragement while I had no idea what was going on. God is good!!

#35: The sacrifice of Christ. In Colossians chapter one there is an epic passage about Christ, about who He is, about what He did for mankind. Take time today and go read it. You will not be dissapointed! Colossians 1: 15-23

What we prayed for.

Tuesdays nights are set aside for a staff prayer meeting. We meet together and then spend some time praying for the school, for individual students, and for other things that we fell may need prayer. The prayer meeting is an important part of what we are doing here. It gives a places for teachers to talk about the difficulties they are facing, and it is an opportunity to share what God is doing in each of our lives.
I would like to share the prayer requests with you, so that you may know specific things to pray for.

First we prayed for Japan, specifically for the church to rise up and show the people of Japan that Christians are generous and compassionate people. We prayed for warmer weather, as so many people are stuck without heat and water in really cold temperatures.

Second we prayed for Selma’s daughter. Selma is a lady who lives in the church building that the school is run out of. Her 15 year old daughter and the daughter’s friend were abducted two weeks ago. The friend was found in a trash can, raped, naked, unconscious, and with a massive head injury. She is in the hospital now, but can not remember anything and is therefore unable to help with the whereabouts of Selma’s daughter.
***I was just told that her daughter was found and it at home safe! I may pass on more details if we hear anything else.

Third we prayed for Mr. Gumbo’s work visa. His current visa expires on Saturday and we have yet to hear from the Ministry of Home Affairs about the renewal application. It would be a very difficult situation if he had to leave.

Fourth we prayed for the land that the school is trying to purchase. The school has been given the funds to build a new building, but is still in need of a piece of property.

Fifth we prayed for the Miller family, they are long time supporters of the school and they sponsor two of the kids in our school. The Millers are a hard-working and friendly family. Yesterday Mrs. Miller helped out in my second grade Art class, and Mr. Miller helped out in David’s discipleship class. We prayed for their safety as they will be traveling to the Northern part of Namibia this week.

Lastly we prayed for a boy who lives in Wisconsin. His name is Joshua, he is a young boy who has no immune system. His birthday is today and he asked that instead of gifts people donate money towards a child at Community Hope School. Pray for his healing!

Church!

We found a church here we really like. It is called All Nations Christian Church, it is a local church run by a German man and his South African wife. The church is attended by people from all over the world. The thing we love about this church is how friendly the congregation is. We tried three other churches before finding this one, and it seems like this is the one we will be staying with. After the service a lady chased us down and invited us to their Bible study group. We are looking forward to getting to know more people in the community, and to making some friends out side of school.

God is good!